Sunday, February 22, 2009

Small Improvements

Fran has made some small improvements with her physical therapy. She is standing (reluctantly) anywhere from 40 seconds to 4 minutes on the parallel bars. There are therapists right there with her encouraging as much as possible. There is still some shaking in her hands but her skills with eating utensils have greatly improved. Each day she is applying foundation, lipstick and perfume. She looks forward to her Tuesday “hair days,” along with every other lady in the center.

Several days this week Philip and I split up our visiting times. Phil would go in right after work and visit for an hour or so and then I would visit after her dinner until her eyes got heavy. She is aware of her surroundings so much better now, although she still does have some confusing thoughts, at times.

Every once in awhile she thinks things are missing from her room and are being taken by some of the hired help. Philip and I keep track of her belongings and reassure her that there is no stealing going on. The social worker told us that this is a pretty common worry for the elderly and she sees it some with the residents.

Eye Exam and "Eye-Hop"

On Friday, Fran and I had an eye exam appointment. We picked her up about 3:15 p.m. and headed to the doctor's office. While we were waiting, Mom told Phil about her lunch. She said that she had some “pounded chicken”. Everyone in the office had a good laugh at our comedian mother.

Fran explained to the doctor that when she tried to read, the middle of the sentences were blurry. After a thorough exam, the decision was made to have two pair of glasses made - one for distance and one for reading. The trifocals were not doing the job for her and the doctor thinks they were causing the blurriness.

We had fun picking out frames with the assistance of two young technicians oohing and aahing over how she looked in different frames. The appointment took about two and a half hours.
When we finished we all decided to go to IHOP for dinner. Three pancakes, bacon, and several cups of coffee later, Fran was very content. We all were tired from the day so off we went to take her back to the rehab center. On our way back, she decided that she wanted some cheese crackers for her room. We stopped for those and then took a tired, but happy southern lady back to tuck into bed for the night. One of her favorite aides was waiting for her to help get her settled.

Hopefully. her glasses will be ready to pick up by mid-week and we all can plan another outing. Fun was had by all.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Valentine’s Day for Mrs. May

Saturday was another good day for Fran. She won a pretty t-shirt with hearts on it at the center’s bingo game. She received flowers from her three children, along with a box of chocolates. (She REALLY enjoyed the chocolates!)

Phil put on a piano concert for the center, as per Fran's request. It's fun to watch her sitting next to the piano while he plays....definitely a proud Momma! The piano permeates throughout the center and residents come from all directions to hear the music. Philip needs to work up a few new pieces because he has been playing so frequently that he has just about gone through his whole collection of music that he knows well. (He memorizes his pieces and plays without sheet music.)

We left Fran with her dinner tablemates and headed out to celebrate Valentine’s Day together at the Outback restaurant. There are small improvements that are positive improvements. Each day is an adventure!

Fran Shops 'til She Drops

Each day this week while visiting Fran, she would have either one of us jot down items on a pad of paper that she needed from the store. The list had the following items: combs, new shade of lipstick, socks, slacks (white and black), nail polish remover, new shade of nail polish, makeup foundation and a new bra. Each of these items Fran already had, but we went along with it because she is really beginning to think things through. We arranged for the three of us to go shopping at our local Target on Friday.

I called the rehab center about 3:00 p.m. and asked that they have Fran ready to go out with us about 4:00 p.m. Philip and I got in from work and went over to start out on our shopping adventure. Fran was ready when we got there and very happy to see us. Mark, one of her favorite nursing assistants, had her looking cute with her hair brushed and lipstick on. Off we went.

The first transfer from her wheelchair into our car went very smoothly. As soon as she got in the car, she pulled down the visor to see how she looked in the mirror. She said that Mark had done a good job with her lipstick. The ride to Target took about 10 minutes. Once there, we parked in a handicapped parking space and got Fran back into her wheelchair, another smooth transfer for Fran and Phil.

Inside the store Fran was in her glory: Lipstick, nail polish, foundation and socks! I was impressed at how she was comparing prices and looking for bargains. We looked at Valentine candy and she decided we could come back and get some once it went on sale. (gotta feed that chocolate craving!).

The next item was the bra. She told me the size she needed and I went into search mode. I was one aisle over being entertained at the conversation going on between Phil and his mom. I had to chuckle when Fran gave Phil directions, "Get me that white one, see what the size is on that white one".

We tried to find some new slacks but were unsuccessful. I told her we would have better luck at Belk's. She said that was a good idea and we could go there next.

I asked Fran if she was getting hungry and if she was in the mood for a small pizza. Her eyes lit up. I had decided that eating out in an Applebee's or Chili's on a Friday evening would be a bit too overwhelming for her. I suggested to Philip that Target had a Pizza Hut and Starbucks attached and we could eat there. Besides, it was a much quieter environment and made for one less transfer. The three of us enjoyed a small pan pizza and soda. Fran loves pizza. I think Philip was counting on getting her last piece but she gladly finished it herself.

Fran said she wanted to go to Belk's and see about some slacks. Once we got back in the car she decided she could look for slacks the next time we go out. Needless to say, we were relieved! Phil's back was just about maxed out! Once we got back to the rehab we reviewed all of her purchases with her, wooing over each item. Fran was happy with everything and was more than ready to hit the bed.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Duane's Heart

Dear Anita (Fran's middle child),

Please let Duane (age 4) know that his Great-Grandmother has the green heart that he made her hanging on her bulletin board. She seemed quite pleased when she opened the envelope with your letter.

You and Aldeen (Wenger) have been been faithful with your cards and letters. Your Mom received a nice note from Faith (a wonderful caregiver who helped with Fran last spring) with a picture enclosed of Fran, Aunt Ginny. and Faith. The picture was taken in mid-October when Faith was working some with Aunt Ginny and took her in to see your Mom at the Harrisonburg Rehab Center.

I had been sick with a sinus infection since Friday through yesterday (2-9-09) so I was unable to go see your Mom. Philip went daily while I was under the weather. I got in late yesterday afternoon and spent about 3 hours with her. She has a roommate named Sunny and they seem to be getting along well. Sunny is confused some also.

I have taken in a few Valentine decorations to brighten up her room. I will take a picture of Fran this weekend with her Valentines and flowers and send it to you.

Have a nice day!

Love,
Maribeth, your sister-in-law

Friday, February 13, 2009

Dueling.......

(Posted by Mary, the oldest child of the Fran May clan.)

Maribeth was sick last week and was flat out busy at work this week so I'm going to give you a summary of "The Duel" to save her time. She usually puts in funny descriptions, so I'll edit it later if she comes up with more details. Anyway, here's what happened:

Mother is out of isolation and has a roommate named Sunny, who is also sometimes mixed up like Mother. She and Mother both have trouble hearing.

The home supplies a TV for residents for a while but later, they need to bring in their own TVs. Phil and Maribeth took in a nice TV that had been in Levi's room. One day when Phil went to visit, Mother wasn't in her room - she was at therapy. The remote for Mother's TV was in Sunny's bed. Phil didn't want to cause trouble so went to the nurses' station to ask them how to handle getting Mother's remote back. I'm not sure how, but they did retrieve it. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Sunny's family brought in a TV for Sunny.

Now, when Phil and Maribeth go to visit, they often find both ladies sound asleep with both their TVs blasting at full volume. I'd call that "Dueling TVs". Don't you agree?

Monday, February 9, 2009

The Duel

Coming soon: The Duel at the Nursing Home

Friday, February 6, 2009

Funny Frances May

This week there have been a few funny moments with Fran that I would like to share with all of you.

Every Tuesday at Pleasant Manor Rehab is “Beauty Saloon” Day. All the ladies get so excited and look forward to coming back with the same blue hair-do, curled tight and very shiny. Fran told me she wanted to go again and get her hair done like she had last week. I let the social director know and she made her a standing appointment. Philip stopped in to see Fran this past Tuesday in the middle of the afternoon. He couldn’t find her in her room, not in therapy, and not in the dining hall. He finally was directed to the “beauty saloon”. When he walked in he found Fran sound asleep under the dryer. He said she looked peaceful, so he went back to work.

I stopped by later to see her and told her how nice her hair-do looked. She said she had to tell the hairstylist not to put any of that purple and blue stuff on her hair because “it makes you look old” and she is a lot younger than anyone in there. The social worker Belyne sat down with Fran to have a glass of tea. Out of the clear blue sky she told Belyne that “getting old sucks”. Where did that come from? Belyne laughed and that seemed to get Fran going so she said it a few more times. I still have trouble visualizing Fran, my mother-in-law, at the age of 83, and always a southern lady, saying something like that!!!! (From Mary: I wonder if she knows what it means?)

Yesterday I stopped in about 2:00 pm and Fran had just gotten back from therapy. We talked for a bit and I told her that there were some singers in the social hall and we should go catch their show. I wheeled her down and we found a spot up front for her wheelchair and a chair for me. Two men were playing guitars and singing bluegrass. All the ladies (most with blue hair) were having a good time joking back and forth with the performers. Fran was tapping her foot, clapping and singing along to “Happy Trails to You”. She looked real cute.

After the performers finished, the social director announced that the next activity was board games. Fran pulled me close and said, “Maribeth, let's get out of here, I want no part of these silly games.” I pushed her out to the front hallway and we sat and visited. She told me that the music the men played would go real well in Texas. I told her we were in Texas, she said to me, “You may be in Texas, but I’m in Virginia.” We both laughed so hard. She loves to be funny and still enjoys joking around.

Sometimes Fran’s mind is with us and "right on", other times she is in her own little world. Most of the time she appears to be upbeat and I have noticed fewer times of paranoia. Keep the prayers and cards coming.

Fran May’s Favorite Daughter-in-law,
Maribeth

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Momma May Update from Phil

Maribeth & I see Mom each day. Today she was in good spirits. Her orientation is ever-changing....about half the time she knows that she is in Texas. She was lucid for this visit, and her sense of humor is totally intact. She keeps us laughing with the funny and unusual stuff she says.

She transfers more easily from bed to wheelchair and back and to bed. She talks about walking but is still not even close to making it happen. I sat in on her physical therapy session yesterday. All the workers were very patient with her and I have to say, "Hats off," to those guys. I got frustrated just watching the whole ordeal! They tried to get her to stand in the parallel bars to walk. After much cajoling and encouragement she did stand with help on all sides and actually took a few steps. It’s a beginning, at least.

Last week we took Momma out of the rehab center to our home here in Waxahachie. She was happy to be out of the building for a while. We had a good lunch of chicken tenders, fresh biscuits and fresh “strong stove coffee”. We watched the Funny Girl movie till it was just about finished, but Mom wanted to get back to the rehab center because she said that it would take 2 hours to get there - really it only takes about 12 minutes.

On the way back Mom had us stop at Walgreens to get a few boxes of candy that she wanted to give to her caregivers. Actually, Mom is the one with the “sweet tooth”, and she assumes everyone else has one too. (Note from Mary: "I surely did inherit that sweet tooth!")

Mom goes to the facility cafeteria now instead of eating in her room. That’s "a good thing." (Mom often used this term from Martha Stewart.) She socializes and her visiting skills are still intact enough that she is pretty much the spark plug at her assigned table.

She got her hair washed, trimmed and set at the center's “beauty saloon”, which she enjoyed and wants to do it again soon.

In two weeks I am going to take Mom to a local optometrist for an exam and new glasses. She fusses at each visit that she wants a change in glasses because she wants to read again. That’s progress.

We try to call someone from Virginia by phone at most of our visits to keep her connected to folks. The other day Mom wanted to talk to Anita. When we got her on the phone and she was in the process of reading books to her grandson, Duane. Mom was so pleased when Duane sang 2 songs to her, the ABC song and The Itssy, Bitsy Spider. The phone was on the speaker mode so the three of us were able to enjoy his singing.

Keep the prayers coming!
Fil